I, even today, do not believe in an Omen and an Ill-Omen but things have happened in my life, which have forced me to question my beliefs.
“Have you taken your apparatus?”, my mom asked.
“Yes”, I answered, now for the 15th time. “I have taken everything but what I really need now is a lot of luck. I am really getting a bad feeling about today. I think I am going to flunk.” I muttered, leaving house for the exam-centre. Deep in my heart, I felt that God would let me down this time and I would flunk. I had lost all my self-confidence.
This was, hopefully for me, the last I wanted to see of my biggest nemesis, “Indirect Taxation”.
7 papers back to back had already taken out the wind in my sails. I shared a hate-hate relation with indirect taxes and service tax always had me in tears. I sincerely prayed to God that I manage to get atleast 40 marks in the exam, for a chance to clear the exam in set-off. One more “decent” paper and the battle of CA Final would have reached the final leg of “Prayers and Hope”.
The exam-centre was not too far with a 15 min. stroll sufficing the cause. I wonder what prompted me to look into my bag again, but I was baffled to see my Hall-ticket missing. I scampered home to pick it up. On my way back I saw a young girl, maybe just my age then. She was not my friend, neither do I recall speaking a word with her. But, hers was one of those faces that when you look at, you don’t really feel anything but just the feeling of carrying on the gaze at that face. We exchanged a glance and she mutely wished me luck via lip movements. Although I didn’t know her, even I silently moved my lips to say “Thank You”. (who wouldn’t smile back to a girl after she has smiled at you first and that too, in my case, wished me luck!). I then re-sprinted back the exam-center.
The CA battle ended on that day and later when the results came out I understood that I had managed to be victorious.
As a part of natural progression, I finished my atricleship in the following 2 months and started my quest for a job.
“Thanks for coming for the interview. We’ll get back to you later.” For me I thought to have fared well in the interview but, the ‘We’ll get back to you later’ had almost dampened my hopes. This looked like the 4th straight rejection (non-acceptance actually - so that it doesn’t sound too bad) that I was to go through while getting a job. Although the pay packet was not out of the roof, it was somewhere around what I was looking out for. Plus, it was amongst the best rated companies and the profile too was what I liked. I wanted that job quite desperately.
I was crestfallen, but while returning home, I saw Bhagya, Bhagya Verma. Actually, I came to know her name later. We exchanged smiles, but our voices still failed to vent a “Hello”.
Bhagya lived in our locality, well two lanes apart, actually. She was one of the 4 sisters of her family. Theirs was, as I later understood from their neighbor, a very simple family who just about managed to live hand to mouth. Her father owned a small grocery shop.
This was our second exchange of glimpses. I recollected the first time our eyes had met which was just before the 8th paper of my CA final exams. Needless to say, she looked just as beautiful as before.
The following day I had to leave for Pune for a family function with my family. It was my cousins wedding and a pleasurable week there had pumped in some fuel in me. We came back and I got a pleasant surprise. I had been shortlisted for the opening and the company had sent me the offer letter which read ‘To be signed and returned within one week’. The joining date was slated to be just the day after, and I got very busy since then. Trainings and Late sittings had become a part of my life. Almost 3 months had passed and one day when I could wrap up work early, I thought, why not peep into Bhagya’s house and say “Hello” and try to break the ice?
I reached her building and managed to locate her flat as I knew that she lived on the ground floor. Just then, her inquisitive neighbor, aged around 65, Ms. Sharma (I understood reading the name-plate on the door) happened to ask me who I was looking for. I didn’t know her name then.
“Bhagya?” she asked. That’s one thing I like about talkative people, they give out information even when it is not asked for. I nodded retiringly.
“Well, what a poor girl, I tell you” she started. “It must have been only 5 months since her father died and the poor thing has now the shop thing haunting her since the last 3 months. You know about that don’t you?”
“Yes.”, I lied, giving the impression that I was well aware of it.
“What a pity, the family has lost its only source of livelihood, the grocery shop, which was gutted by fire after an accident and they are now managing only on the savings since the last 3 months. But you know what …” she paused as if to get her breath back.
“What?”, I replied and paused, wanting her to continue the story.
“You know what, Bhagya is about to get married soon. She is to be married the next week. Her, to be husband is quite a good man they say and has a good business in Delhi. It will be a simple marriage. They have not yet invited us, but I’m sure they will.” she persevered the conversation.
I sulked at the last statement and left.
Two years had passed since I had seen her. I had never happened to have spoken, rather even seen Bhagya or her mother, or her sisters in the interim. Although, I did manage to dodge Ms. Sharma thrice. I realised that Bhagya had been married and hoped that she lived happily.
My Dad was detected of leukemia and the Doctors had already asked me to start looking for Bone Marrow donors. I had tried all my relatives, but none had a perfect match. I was helpless but had not given up hope totally.
I was on my way back from the daily evening routine of visiting the temple for my Dad. I prayed to God to give my Dad a healthy life and happiness again, from MY share of joy on this earth.
I saw Bhagya again. Apparently, she seemed to have come for her Delivery of her baby to her mothers’ place. We exchanged glances and smiles yet again. This time I whispered “Congratulations” mutely and she responded by nodding and saying “Thank you” via lip movements. Atleast, there is something good happening in this world, I told myself.
The next day, I got a call from my Mom during lunchtime and she told me that there was a call from the hospital and that the doctors wanted to talk to me about something important. I went to the hospital straight away. I was really tensed.
“We have some news for you young man.” said the Doctors, as I turned numb.
“Well, don’t worry its good news. We have found a donor of the bone marrow. All tests are done and it’s a perfect match. So, prepare yourself to deposit 2 lacs. We propose to operate him in the next 4 days, on Sunday.”
I don’t recollect getting sleep for the next 4 days. I actually got even more tensed after the doctors had broken the good news. I prayed that everything go right from there. Fortunately, it did and the transplant was a success.
Sunday brought in good news of the transplant being successful.
I came back home from the hospital that evening after my usual temple visit. I noticed a huge gathering of people dressed in white; and sounds of cold whispers some lanes far from my house. Someone had passed away. I didn’t bother worrying and rushed home, had a bath and rushed back to the hospital again. My Dad was alright and Doctors said that his recovery will start soon. I was on Cloud nine.
Two weeks later, a friend of mine informed me that Bhagya had lost her mother. I was shocked to hear that. My brain, I think must have stopped working for a while.
“There is nothing one can do about it right?” my friend said. “Its just sheer bad luck” he continued.
“It has to be more than that.” I replied.
“Hey, take it easy, its just that its happening too quick for her. That’s it. Life is unpredictable and death is inevitable, isn’t it?”
“Maybe you are right.” I agreed. ‘Maybe I was not expecting something bad to happen to her, that’s why I am feeling bad. Things will fall in place.’ I consoled myself.
4 months later my life was far from peaceful. I left home a bit late than usual as I had to be at a hearing. The hearing was for a legal case. The case was that our tenant had claimed the ownership of the house. He had forged a non-existent ‘Sale’ document and had also robbed us of our money. More than anything, he had robbed us of our mental peace.
It was an open and shut case in the court of law, as we had ‘No evidence’ to prove him wrong.
Somehow, whenever I used to be in trouble, I always used to close my eyes and have the picture of Bhagya in front of me and think of how brave she was to face so many problems in life at such a young age. That day too, I was thinking about her at the railway station on my way to the Court; and Bang! There she was. From what appeared, she was going back to Delhi with her daughter (I learnt from Ms. Sharma that she had had a baby daughter). This time though, we saw each other but only to look in different directions soon. She was looking beautiful as ever in her pink sari, carrying her new born small baby; and the big red kumkum line on her forehead made her look even prettier.
For all you know that day, I won the court case. The tenant showed up at the court and accepted his fraud.
“Only a supernatural power could have brought about such a change of heart from that man.”
I chuckled to Mom that night.
“I don’t think there can even be something so supernatural to have changed his mind.”, my Dad said and we laughed aloud.
That night, I couldn’t sleep a wink. I kept thinking of Bhagya. After some introspection into the critical events of my life that night, I concluded that all good events were preceded by a glimpse of Bhagya. Maybe she was my lucky charm. But, deep down, I felt sad for her.
After all, why should she be the only one having such troubles in life. Was it just bad luck or was it that she was doing something wrong? Or was it someone else who was doing it to harm her? Or was it just God’s will? I couldn’t figure out.
A year passed after that and I had to go to our client’s place for a meeting. Our client was not too happy with our service and had asked for a renegotiation of fees after we had bid them a 20% hike before he renewed the contract with us. It was my duty to convince them for the fees. This was our big fish and accounted for almost 10% of our company’s annual revenues. Unfortunately, I had to be in the line of fire. I hoped that the meeting went well. A good meeting would not only ensure a raise, but also a promotion. The client was in Delhi and I flew up to Delhi. I reached the clients office almost half an hour early.
I made myself comfortable in the lobby. As I usually did in testing times, I closed my eyes and glimpses of Bhagya flashed across. As I opened my eyes, I had goose bumps to see her taking a seat at the reception. She was working there as a Receptionist, I understood. A half smile almost broke out on my face and I started getting some positive vibes. I stood up and tried to approach her to have a chat.
But, she looked a bit different this time. As I walked toward her, I wondered why she was wearing a white sari. My smile vanished when I did not see the red line of kumkum on her forehead. I still went ahead and I uttered an audible “Hi”. She just smiled back reticently and tried to hide her face.
“Its ok Bhagya, its been almost a year since you lost your husband, Ankur. Look at your kids. You have to smile.” her colleague interrupted as she noticed that everything was not well with Bhagya.
The world seemed to have stopped revolving when I quickly flashed back all our meetings.
Could it be that …. No, I said to myself.
Could it really be that … just as every sight of Bhagya was a Good Omen for me fixing the problems in my life and bringing Good Luck to me … could it be that … every sight of Me was indeed an Ill-Omen for her and brought her Bad Luck?
That day, we did get the contract with the revised fees and later, I got promoted.
I don’t know how and where Bhagya is today. Rather, I don’t want to know that. It just makes me feel guilty.
As I said, I, even today, do not believe in an Omen and an Ill-Omen but things have happened in my life, which have forced me to question my beliefs.
